Ala Vaikunthapurramuloo

A friend had recently shared a list of South Indian movie recommendations with me. I was excited to expand my purview of movies from the Indian sub-continent, especially as I had heard about some really good movies coming out of that part of India. I trust this friend’s taste but I think he tried to bamboozle me with this one. 😉 Out of the 15 or so movies he recommended what are the chances that I stepped on this Easter egg first? M, I haven’t lost faith yet! I will continue watching the others after I am over the injuries inflicted by Ala Vaikunthapuramaloo.

I have to admit my appreciation of an out and out South Indian hit may be a bit off. This movie made over 260 crore rupees at the box office and has an IMDB rating over 7. I, however, was not able to sit through this past the 45 minute mark. I kept giving myself 5 minute increments – 9 times! – until a violent voice inside me said “Kill this movie NOW or somebody is gonna get hurt!” Fearful of my own fury I stopped.

At first I thought I am watching a David Dhawan-esque movie with South Indian sensibilities. Bit by bit it dawned on me that my grey cells were at risk of mass extinction if I continued. Why? Here’s a sampling…

• The way the nurse holds a newborn and slaps him to check if he is alive might actually do the opposite…
• 2020…I know, Corona and all…but a mullet hairstyle for the main lead?
• There is a whole ‘fly in the air’ type of action sequence. Bonus: a chunni – used as a weapon – gets washed in the whole process!
• 20 minutes into it the first song hits you over the head with so much bling that it makes the Golden Temple in Amritsar look pale – giant gold rapper pendant, gold playing cards, gold sneakers, gold car keys, …
• The lead actor gets a job by hanging his future employer upside down by his legs. Go figure.
• The “heroin” is objectified down to her legs (literally) from the moment she enters the frame. The “hero” simply cannot take his gaze off of her legs for any conversation he is having with her. I finally lost it when the next song came on: “My eyes are hooked on to your legs!” [<– literal translation]

These are just sample atrocities from the first 45 minutes!

My ratings scale is shaken right now but I’ll give this a 1/10 purely so I can keep my faith alive in Tollywood. (1/10)

Pray for my mental recovery and I shall be back with another Kolly-/Tolly-/Mollywood review for you soon.