Bombay Velvet

Take Kramer from Seinfeld, put him through a cuteyfication machine and on the other end it will spit out Johnny from Bombay Velvet. I have a feeling Anurag Kashyap sat down each evening with a glass of whiskey, and then two and then three because the story he piecemealed got progressively worse. Hat tip to Ranbir Kapoor for getting really bad movies but acting out his characters so well. Anushka and Raveena’s dresses and make-up are to drool for. If I could flick a wand we’d all be in the 50s now wearing breathtaking dresses and glamorous make-up and hair. (3/10)

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